Out with the Old ....

We came back from NYC on the 3rd Jan.

I am still jetlag from the long flight home.

But I'm sure that it is more from the long pause from my daily routine.

Very happy to see my cats are still alive and actively ambushing Ginny, the oldest cat.

Mom and Dad are still squabbling as usual (old routine).

My girl was so excited about school that she can't sleep.

We were both awake at 1am in the morning!

Anyhow, with the old routine right smack on my face,

I started work, reluctantly, on the 4th Jan.

It felt like I had been gone a long while, instead of 2+ weeks.

Seems kind of weird settling into the whole home-work-home routine.

And even weirder, was the weekend; sleep-late, home all day, sleep-even-later, & weekend's over!

So with all this daily old routine, I had a small new year resolution.

I need to break such routine, especially the weekend ones!

Should get myself back to squash, or swimming, or some kind of exercise routine.

Also, should do less sleep-late routine and sleep-even-later routine.

I should also make time to pamper myself with all those beauty products that I bought in NY.

(for what, I don't know?)

Anyway, let's see if I manage to do all of the above.

And maybe, by mid-year, I can safely say that I've break the old routine for a newer me!

Wheee!!!

Uniq-lo!!!

We went shopping over the holiday weekend.

It was fun, and me and my little girl got some good bargains.

We were at ION when we stumbled upon this shop - Uniqlo.

I've been wanting to visit this shop cos I heard that they carry good affordable clothes.

So off we went in, and we were not disappointed.

All in all we spent @$200. But we had a total of 8pcs.

My girl got her lovely winter fleece jacket for $59, and its worth it.

We bought several thermal wears for around $10 each.

If Singapore has winter, I would have bought more.

But since it is not, I was forced to curb my spending.

Anyway, it is not a bad shopping trip.

Now, no more shopping, until we reach New York.

Then we will go for a 2-weeks shopping spree!! Wheee!!

(so glad that S$ is getting stronger against the US$.... wheee again!!!)

Escapism

Listening to the lyrics of a song going..

"If I could I follow you, if I could..."

exact sentiment of my current state of mind.

The only question that follows is "who is 'you'?"

Burnt in my brain, the pain of betrayal and lies,

and I never understood why, the reasons behind it all.

And now, at this juncture, situations to my left and right so dismal.

I can't look at the past without questioning my decision for the future.

Somehow, I have to decide... hopefully not now.

But there is no escape, the decision has to be made.

Yes, to take steps to correct the wrong, the path is walled with thorns.

The ground is filled with amber coals, some ashes and burning fires.

It is never easy.

Life is such that after going through the pain, Life reaps new meaning.

Yes, the light at the end... so bright and so blinding.

I have yet to decide which path to take, left, right, front and back.

And with no guiding hands to help me choose, I'm left with a hollow heart...

But like what the song said, if I could follow I would...

I have no guts, no strength to leave my life in your hands right now...

I'm still cowering in my corner, wishing I could escape from all this.

Cat-pee-lah!!

Teddyboy, the youngest in the gang is down with FLUTD.

FLUTD, what's dat??

Feline Lower Urinary Tract Disease.

Not contagious, induced by food, or stress, or dirty litter, or simply idiopathic (unknown) means.

History:

3 weeks back he had this, and was put on antibiotic for 10days.

He recovered and was bouncing around within 3 days.

Last Saturday, he started the out-of-litterbox routine again.

He was crouching and straining himself on everything else, carpets, toilet floor, kitchen mats,

and everywhere else, however to no effect.

So Sunday morning I rushed him to Mt Pleasant Emergency, only to be told that the doc is not available until after 8.30am. And the charges for emergency consultation will be $267!!

So off we went to AMK vet, and by 9.30am he was seen and then warded.

We took him back from the vet on Monday night, he looked miserable.

He still has bloody urine and is not able to pee properly.

We have to administer drips daily and also unplug his urinary catheter daily.

I can't sleep, can't eat and can't rest, just worrying about him.

He looks so weak and refuses to eat. He only drinks a bit of water.

Poor Teddy, we're trying our best here...

Even Nyai has taken turn to take care of him in the day while I'm at work.

My little girl takes care of him once she's home from school.

All of us taking turns to care for him, round-the-clock.

I hope he knows how much we love him!!

Though this may sound funny, I pray to God that Teddy can pee again!!

Hair, Wear & Tear...

I have a long love-hate relationship with my hair.

Either it is too short or too long, too thick or too baldy,

too-whatever-is-the feeling-of-that-moment.

The last few weeks I felt so bored with myself, felt old and miserable.

I was too tired to pay attention to my hair until I looked at myself in the mirror yesterday.

Gosh! I look so beaten, haggard and tired.

But then, I got inspired to get a cute haircut.

Heavy top and thin bottom... sounds like me (or what I wish to be, hee hee!)

So off to the hair saloon after work.

And with the sheer genius of my stylist friend, there I was, looking good again.

I felt totally young and refreshed.

Feel my energy is renewed and my smile came back to a girlish grin!!

Step out of the saloon, I felt many eyes looking at me,

saw people giving me second glance...

it is either the hairstyle or the re-born spirit that was unleashed from

the strands of hair snipped.

This will last for at least 2 months before the outcropping starts again.

But at least I have 2 months of the look-good feeling!!

One year on.... (almost)

Didn't feel like a year... seriously.

Time really flies.

I'm still here, doing something, trying to do something...

Had a brush with the enemy, but I controlled myself...

not wanting to stoop down that low.

Eid has come, another year of reflections of what I've done...

My girl's condition is now more stable.. she's responding well to her meds.

Now we are trying to wean her off the steroids.

Mom and dad... ahh.

What can I say?

I'm living my life the best way I know and can...

Mom and dad... the unending drama in my life!

Going to NYC this december.

My niece is coming along with us.

Hope everything will go well.

I told her that only lodging is provided, everything else will be on our own.

Only God knows what and how my hubby is doing for himself.

I have, kind of, let go...

I need strength to let go...

Only God knows......

Wonder what is in store for me in the future.....

A New Start

I recently transferred back to main office. In Oct in fact.
I requested the transfer and was readily accepted by my GM.
Though it has been refreshing, I still reminisce my time in Sbldg.

Lots of things happened after I left.
And the latest one is A's resignation.
I know that like most of the boys, he also felt like I had abandoned him.
And to make things worse, there was no replacement for my position.
Therefore, he had to take up most of my responsibility.

I don't blame him for leaving. Many times I asked him if he's angry.
His reply was "I'm angry with the mgmt, not you!"
I feel relieved, but sad at the same time.
So when he confided in me about his resignation, I was half-heartedly happy for him.
He deserves more, and he can do more for himself.
He felt like he was stuck in a rut and therefore all the more he should make a move.
I told him that. I made the move because of my unhappiness with the situation.
It's been a positive change and I'm happier now, though it's quite a challenge to be doing things on your own.

Also, now there will be no more 'competition' with J.
She has been wanting to fill my position since I left, trying her best to win over the boys.
I let her be as I'm not there anymore.
The boys have all been good to me while I was there.
And even now still happy to see me when we ran into each other in main office.

A's leaving will make another impact to a gaping hole left behind by me.
Some have came up to me and commented on the 'loss' in Sbldg.
I had to put on a brave face and say well that's life.
Deep down inside I'm sad to see things going south like this.
But what to do? I can only watch and see.
I'm in no position to stop the change.
And change is inevitable.

I had dinner date with A, a month ago.
We had many things to catch up on.
It's really been a long time since we really talked.
Dinner was great. We had a long walk after dinner.
It was nice and refreshing.
And we are still good friends.

I'm glad to have worked in Sbldg for the last 2 years.
It has not been a waste of time. I've no regrets.
I've learnt many things, in both work and personal level.
And the boys just make my life more colourful and rewarding.
Thanks guys!! I do miss all of you.
Thanks for all the wonderful memories.